Flight Petty Officer 2nd Class
I Do Not Yet Want to Die!
by Senri Nagasue
This page's author, Senri Nagasue, is a former pilot in the Kamikaze Special Attack Corps
Yashima Unit. He authored several books on kamikaze pilots and created a large
website called Aozora no hateni (To the blue sky's end)
with many stories about the Kamikaze Corps.
Yoshiaki Ono was a Flight Petty Officer 2nd Class who took off from Kokubu
No. 2 Air Base on April 28, 1945, in a Type 99 (Val) dive bomber of the Kamikaze
Special Attack Corps 2nd Seitō Squadron. The squadron lost six Type 99 dive
bombers and twelve crewmembers in the special attack. Ono was a member of the
12th Kō Class of the Navy's Yokaren (Preparatory Flight Training Program) .
The following letter was written by a classmate named Yoshiaki Ono, who died
in battle as a member of the Kamikaze Special Attack Corps 2nd Seitō Squadron.
The letter was sent to me by Mutsuko Ono, Yoshiaki's older sister, for the book
Last Letters and Writings of Classmates Who Died in Battle.
April 15, 1945
Dear Father, Mother, and Sister,
Thank you for everything you did during my lifetime. Now I
have been chosen to go to Okinawa to make a decisive counterattack against
our hated enemies, the Americans.
When I reflect back, my life only has been
full of wonderful memories. During the 18 years of my life, by the love of
you father and mother, I can give my short 18 years as a member of the
Special Attack Corps of the skies.
Truly I cannot suppress this
long-cherished desire. In spite of facing death in air battles off Taiwan, I
shamelessly survived and truly apologize to my comrades who died before me.
Now at last I will have a splendid place to die, so I can apologize to my
comrades and to you father and mother.
Without any regrets I can go to crash
into an enemy ship. I hope my hometown friends are doing well and striving
their hardest, and please say hello from me to my friends at work, school,
and the farm. Please also give my best regards to Uncle Nakamura and to my
As I write this letter of final farewell, I say goodbye
to this life. Please take care. Father, Mother, and Sister, I wish you the
Mutsuko Ono wrote the following letter to me when she sent me her brother's
I wish you health and joy this New Year. Only two postcards came from my
older brother from Shanghai. In addition to these, only his last letter
remains. On the morning of April 25, 1945, Kaneyuki Fukuda's mother came
with the following news, "I just returned from a visit to Kagoshima. If you
go soon, you may be able to still see your son."
My mother and I quickly got tickets, and we started from Kurume City by
night train. Early the next morning we arrived at West Kagoshima Station.
Soon we heard air raid warnings, and we were delayed until about noon. Even
trains on the Nippō Line were not running. We were worried, but the rail
line opened again at about 4 p.m. We went to Hayato Station, walked from
there as it became evening, and reached Hinatayama Onsen. That evening we
We departed early the next morning. While walking toward the base, there
were more air raid warnings, and we were delayed again at about noon. We
finally arrived at the mountain and were able to meet him at about 1 p.m. on
the 27th. It was a short farewell of about three hours in a farmhouse
The ohagi (rice dumplings covered with bean paste) that my mother had
made and brought from home now tasted funny, since they had been in the heat
for a long time, so unfortunately we could not eat them.
In exchange for the white silk muffler my mother had worked hard to buy,
my brother took off the muffler from around his neck and gave it to us. This
is our only keepsake from him.
Our hearts were touched when at the time of his final parting he spoke
just the words, "I do not yet want to die." These were his last words to us.
The muffler he gave to us had the following words and signatures written on it.
Fall, comet's cherry blossoms by Petty Officer 2nd Class Kashima
Struggle hard, men of Kyūshū
by Petty Officer 1st Class Harashima
Die for an eternal cause by Chief Petty Officer Motokawa
"Hyakurihara Air Base" is written as the address on his last letter,
but I could not copy this part since it is badly damaged. I am sending to
you his final letter and photographs. Please take good care of yourself
during this cold season.
Although Yoshiaki Ono wrote a final letter, he probably wondered about how he
would get it to his family. They fortunately got his message since Kaneyuki
Fukuda's mother went to meet her own son, who was in the same squadron as
Yoshiaki Ono, and stopped by the Ono home in Kurume to deliver it.
In those days, death in battle was considered to be the highest honor. How
much did a mother feel in her heart when sending off her son to certain death in
a special attack squadron? No matter how much the honor, no parents wish their
child's death. The mother's anguish must have been painful.
This writer has experienced also that there are ups and downs in a person's
feelings. Even though someone made a firm decision of "Yes, I'll do it!" when
joining a special attack squadron, thoughts of "I do not yet want to die" arose
as time passed. So both the declaration written in Mr. Ono's last letter and the
words he blurted out at his final farewell when he met his mother represented
his true feelings.
"The public praises us as members of the Special Attack Forces, but the truth
is I do not want to die." This is probably what Mr. Ono really felt as he faced
death the following day. However, even though he could confess his feelings, it
breaks one's heart to imagine the distress of his mother who could do nothing
Translated by Bill Gordon
The photograph and original Japanese version of this page can be found on Senri Nagasue's
web site at:
1. Osuo 2005, 223.
Osuo, Kazuhiko. 2005. Tokubetsu kōgekitai no kiroku (kaigun
hen) (Record of special attack corps (Navy)). Tokyo: Kōjinsha.